One thing I can't do is summarize my year in just one word or one sentence. It was the most incredible, beautiful, challenging, emotional, educational, and amazing year of my life. It's hard to find even a sentence that pinpoints feelings and thoughts but also the impact it had on me as a person, let alone one word. A few times throughout this blog, I made lists to talk about what I was learning, so for Part I of this conclusion I'm going to choose 5 lessons I learned from my year.
Lesson #1:
Everyone is human.
hu·man
ˈ(h)yo͞omən/
adjective
- 1.of, relating to, or characteristic of people or human beings."the human body"
synonyms: anthropomorphic, anthropoid, humanoid, hominid
"in human form"
noun
- 1.a human being, especially a person as distinguished from an animal or (in science fiction) an alien.
synonyms: person, human being, personage, mortal, member of the human race;More
Please note the pieces of the definition which I highlighted. We are susceptible to weaknesses. We note the sensitivities of ourselves and others. It is okay to show these qualities of yourself, and admit them to others. It's even better to notice someone else's weaknesses or sensitivities and do you absolute best to accommodate those things, even help them improve. In order to work as a team, it is essential to know your own weaknesses and recognize your own sensitivities so you can work on self-improvement for the benefit of those around you, and for both team and personal growth. As the great Kelvin Rankin told us, "When conditions and people are at their worst, you must be at your absolute best." As a Team Leader, you need to know how to overcome the obstacles that impact you whether it be physically, mentally, or emotionally, and you need to learn how to recognize it, talk about it, and ask for help when you need it. Know how to keep cool and keep control, especially in high-stress situations. You shouldn't keep it all in all the time, though, because showing a weakness or displaying sensitivity isn't anything negative. It's healthy. It's human. My first lesson as a Team Leader was that we are all human, myself included.
Lesson #2:
Laugh.
Humor is one of the most important things you can carry around with you anywhere you go. In AmeriCorps, we need to travel light (uhhh don't ask my team to grade me on that one) so we really need to be resourceful. Laughter can get you into a conversation, it can be a shield that deflects an uncomfortable topic. Also, an emotional outburst that presents itself in laughter is far better than a flood of tears. I laughed for so many reasons. I laughed because someone made a joke. I laughed because someone didn't. I laughed because sometimes, if I wasn't going to laugh I was going to cry. I laughed because I was genuinely happy. I laughed because someone was being defiant and I thought it was ridiculous. I laughed because I had to, or I wanted to. Sometimes I needed that little nudge from my team to find the humor and recognize that something was funny, because I could be a bit reluctant to let go of the serious side of me. But for those of you who always made an effort to make me laugh or make light of a situation, thank you. And for those of you who laughed at my corny jokes and stupid puns, thank you a little bit more because I know you don't actually think I'm funny. :)
Lesson #3:
Never give up.*
Somewhere down the road, however far away it may be, it's all going to be worth it. The small pieces might not fit together, but the big picture is the most beautiful thing you will ever see. Embrace it. Embrace the challenge. September to March was the hardest 6 months I have experienced in my life, and I honestly feel like I have quite a bit to compare that to outside of the AmeriWorld. Nothing in my life has challenged me quite the way my team did, and the way those few months did. And I know that those months were just as challenging for every member of my team. We were all in it together, but we couldn't see it at the time. However, you have to remember that you're not alone, and every person in that van is a human and each person has their own struggles and their own perceptions of the situation. 9 people are going to understand one sentence in 9 different ways. No two people have the same thought process, and it isn't fair to hold that against them. Even after those short 2-3 months where we were a functioning and happy group, we experienced so much turmoil but I never forgot what we achieved together. I am so proud of each and every one of them for overcoming the obstacles we faced and had I given up in December, the first time I had my doubts, or in January when I was disappointed in myself and in them, and in February when I hit rock-bottom and asked permission to pack my bags (Thank you to the people who told me "No" and reminded me to never give up). I can't imagine where my team would be had I given up on them, or how disappointed I would be in myself because I've never been a quitter and I rarely walk away from a challenge. You never know what the outcome would be, so until it's 100% over, don't give up.
Lesson #4:
Play your part.
What is a team if no one contributes? It isn't a team at all. However, just because one person isn't playing their part to the best of their ability, it doesn't mean you should follow suit and do the same. Lead by example and be the best you possibly can be, even when someone else isn't at their best. Maybe they're having an off day, or week. Maybe they need a little inspiration by seeing someone else work really hard. Maybe they're tired or need some motivation. Their best probably looks a lot different than your best. Neither may be "better" than the other because they both have their strengths and weaknesses, but combine those things as a team and you'll all find that when you play your part to the fullest, others can play their part to the fullest too, and you work together more efficiently, quickly, easily, and happily.
Lesson #5:
Open Up.
Open your heart, open your mind, be open to change, be open to feedback, be open to other options, and be open to new ideas. Absorb as much of the world around you as you can. Absorb the things people say to you. Open your arms to hug your friends (you'll need it). Take it all in. Process it. You can't get anywhere in this program being a closed-minded individual with a one-track mind and a specific way of handling situations. You need to expect that things will change, and you won't be able to prepare for it. You need to know that a team member will say an idea and you can't shut it down. You need to be an active listener, accept feedback (both positive and negative) and do your best to take action. There wasn't a lot of stability and reliability in my year, and I needed to really open up and talk about my stresses and my challenges and open my ears and my mind to listen to the concerns of others. Everything had to be open to alternative options or solutions. This year was all about letting others in.
I could list a hundred things I learned, but right now, in this moment, those are the things that are really sticking with me. I had a stressful summer readjusting to "Real Life" and trying to find that perfect job and keep moving forward, and many of the things I learned in my service year helped me through the stresses of the months following my return home. I gained so many people skills and learned about building relationships in ways I never thought of before, and handling a variety of challenges. I learned about the things I value the most in people and what I appreciate in my life, and countless other lessons, both large and small. But one last thing I learned is that you can't see the outcome until the storm is over (thanks, FEMA!), and there's a lot of clearing of debris that needs to happen to see how the land has changed. I think that is entirely applicable to my service year, because there was a lot that I needed to sort through upon my return home to really know how my experience impacted me. I'm glad I have started to get to a place where I can look back on it and reflect appropriately.
Thank you to my team, Gulf 2, for enduring this experience with me. Thank you to Team Green for keeping me grounded. Thank you to my family for cheering me on, and my friends who stuck with me across the miles. And thank you to anyone who read this blog, kept up with me on social media, and took any interest in my journey.
*This is the part where I cried writing this post. My team is the most beautiful collection of unique individuals I have ever come across in my life, and I appreciate their resilience so so SO much.
*This is the part where I cried writing this post. My team is the most beautiful collection of unique individuals I have ever come across in my life, and I appreciate their resilience so so SO much.
